Kanker sore
Kabhi Alvida Naa Kehna (Don’t Ever Say Goodbye) cements K.Jo’s place as the Queso Midas: everything he touches turns to cheese. Even Brooklyn. How does one make New Yorkers cheesy? Karan Johar manages. Watching this Kal Ho Naa Ho rehash is like the classics minus talent: you know in the first 5 minutes what’s going to happen, and everything in between is just a lot of weeping. There’s something breathtakingly false about taking advice about marital infidelity from Bollywood actors. Though I do give points for the honkytonk-bhangra mashup ‘Rock ‘n Roll Soniye,’ a cynical rework of his own rock-bhangra mix from KHNH. And for casting Saira Mohan.
Only Johar could pound in color palettes with such hammer-to-the-head unsubtlety as to turn me off to Hero. Only Johar would write scenes for preschoolers (though not quite as dumb as Krrap). In real life, nobody’s parents actually urge their daughters-in-law to divorce their sons.
Local nitpicks: SEPTA is a Philly train system which doesn’t run in Manhattan. There’s no Manhattan train station with a big white columned façade — Madison Square Garden wasn’t pretty enough for them. Every other scene is actually filmed in Jersey City or Brooklyn to get the Manhattan skyline. A movie with Christmas decorations suddenly cuts to a scene of autumn leaves. What’s the Columbia campus standing in for? Nobody except the ultrawealthy have apartments that big in Manhattan.
It’s big-budget trash, amateurly written — kabhi ticket na kharidna (don’t ever buy a ticket). After moody excellence like Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi (A Thousand Desires Like These), I can’t stomach this liquid retardation any more.
on Sunday, August 13th, 2006, 12:08 am in Film › 
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ew. I’m seeing it tonight, so I’ll compare notes with you ;) I fear “Rock n Roll Soniye” may be the only highlight…
Saw the movie yesterday and I think “Krish” was better..:). The subject is mature but immaturely written and directed with lengthy cheesy dialogues. Highlights of the movie are the beautifully choreographed songs, great big houses (and decor) and well used colors (except for “I love blue”). Cast Me Wrong? - Amitabh as a Casanova, Shahrukh as a bitter anti-social jerk, Zinta as “a décolleté dressed” magazine exec and the kid (Arjun) as an always scared kid. Save yourself some $$, wait for a DVD and then just watch the songs..:).
thanks for the timely reviews..you saved me the trouble/ordeal …I was planning to watch it tonite.
Instead, I’ll go and watch “Omkara”.
Reading reviews on other websites I thought KANK was worth watching and went yesterday nite to watch..
what a pain it was , the show started at 9.30pm and ended at 1.30 in the nite..
it seemed so long and so over emotional and hard to sit through for so long..
you are right Manish the movie was amateurly written, direction was bad with too many wasted scenes, photography of new york landscape was good but too many closeups of actors/actresses faces that it was bad cinematography at certain places and the storyline doesnot sit well at all with even oldworld or modern indian family values. One of the songs had Rani and sharukh changing colors of their costumes , it looked like imitation of maniratnams ilaypayuthe or sakhi movie song featuring madhavan and shalini…Only saving graces in this movie were javed akhktars lyrics and some great acting by Rani and abhishek..sharukh and Preeti were just ok..one or two songs were catchy and melodious.
Did not feel like it was a karan johar movie..
Omkara is definetely a better movie to watch. shakespeare othello indianised…some great acting from saif ali khan, ajay devgan, kareena and sen.
wish I read this review yesterday, I would have skipped the movie KANK.
Ch…ya. It got new definition these days. :)
Manish, did you write a review for Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi? Link?
Ask and ye shall receive– a Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi review :)
Kal Ho Na Ho tried to pass off large parts of Toronto as NYC !
I don’t think bollywood movies abide by the laws of gravity, geographical limits and common sense…:). But then a lot of hollywood movies get away with the same…I remember they had the wrong side drive in one of the movies supposed to be in Japan and according to “Temple of Doom” we all eat money brains..etc.
Btw, I did offend a female friend of mine with my analysis, so watch out, there might be some “lovers” of the KANK (thanks for acronyms, I don’t have to write the whole thing…).
I don’t know, Abhi_az, I thought the song choreography was dire. They were spectacular, just for the fact that they had so MANY dancers, but I suspect Farah Khan had the flu or something because it was definitely not up to par with her usual creative output. I took the disappointment personally to heart, because she’s a hero of mine.